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#68, July 16th, 2024
Hey Shani,
Can you talk about the word "spinster"? How there is a derogatory term for unmarried, single women? I truly hate it. Men don’t have an equivalent word, do they?
Hey You,
Of course, I’m happy to talk about this word. The way I feel about my singlehood makes all words with bad intentions flow past me, because how can you make me feel bad about something that doesn’t make me feel bad about myself?
You decide if words bother you. You don’t have to abide by social narratives, you don’t have to agree with word usage, and you are in charge of how and why things impact you. If a word bothers you, my suggestion is unpacking why, and then asking yourself if those “whys” deserve to bring you down. Why does the word “spinster” bother us? Because it paints single women as undesired, undesirable, and it’s said in an ugly way, so that people feel ugly themselves. It’s not a nice word, I’ve never liked it, but it also doesn’t bother me because I’ve decided it’s not allowed to.