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#79, October 1st, 2024
Hey Shani,
How do I accept being a late bloomer in a career and life? How do I find role models that aren’t 20?
Hey You,
The term “late bloomer” is a deceptive one, because think about what it’s using as a barometer: People who did shit first. Who says first is better? Who says faster is better? We love thinking of ourselves as getting older and wiser but why do we celebrate our accomplishments far less often than those who just happened to beat us to the punch? You are not a late bloomer and you never were. Late bloomers only exist because other people did things too soon. Have you ever thought of it that way? Why is it always you that’s wrong, never them? Have you ever thought you might be right on time?
I refuse to look at someone’s unique life timeline, including my own, as less-than, simply because the very short list of life accomplishments human beings measure themselves and each other against hasn’t happened by the stroke of midnight on my 30th birthday. We must—and I’m sincere about this—as a society we must stop placing so much ridiculous value on youth and only youth. Do you remember how dumb you used to be? I do! The last person I would have wanted to achieve all those romantic and career “accomplishments” is that girl. I’d so much rather still have them to look forward to now, when I feel more confident in myself than ever before.